Beautiful post by Leo Babauta on the way to be: accept others as they are, because we can’t (really) change someone:
I want to control something that scares me, but I can’t. I’m not in control of the universe (haven’t been offered the job yet), and I’m not in control of anyone else. I want to help, but can’t.
So I melted.
Not melted as in “had a meltdown”, which sounds wonderful if you like melted foods but actually isn’t. I melted as in I stopped trying to control, stopped trying to change him, and instead softened and accepted him for who he is.
And guess what? Who he is? It’s wonderful. Who he is — it’s super awesome mad wonderful. He’s funny and loving and wise and passionate and crazy and thoughtful and philosophical and did I mention crazy?
I melted, and accepted, and only then could I actually enjoy his presence instead of worrying about losing him or changing him.
And this, as I’ve learned, is the best way to be.